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D-backs 1, Cubs 5: Blown away

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Being an hourly manager has its perks

Powerful Hurricane Irma Slams Into Florida Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images

Record: 10-10. Pace: 81-81. Change on 2018: -4.

Ah yes, the glory of being a “non-exempt manager” in that I can set my own schedule each day, just so long as I hit my 40hrs by the end of the work week. Thus after a slew of sales calls, early morning meetings and late evening reception I reach my Friday with only 2.75hrs left to work.

So now I find myself at Kings ready for baseball and a little day drinking.

Beer 1: Flocc Boiz by OHSO

Work week over, beer acquired and game on. Let’s go!

1st half of the frame is uneventful, but Kelly regrettably insists on making his half a little more exciting as he walks two batters after getting a quick out. He dodges another couple bullets and somehow escapes with no blood, didn’t exactly give me warm fuzzies though.

Walker earns his paycheck again in the 2nd, but despite his efforts he can only get to 3B, and Kelly has to return to the mound once more and again he’s off to a shaky start. It gets much much shakier as he gets the bases loaded, and even almost gets out of it , but a comedy of errors occurs on a pop up that Ahmed just can’t track thanks to the wind. 0-2 Cubs, and honestly it could have been much worse......

Beer 2: Hop Troll by Odd 13

Offense fails again in the 3rd and Marte does what we all kinda expect him to do at a new position; make some stupid plays. Looks like he forgot his sunglasses. Luckily the very next play he redeems himself.

I’m both laughing and crying on how we’re handling pop ups. That wind must be brutal. Kinda like our offense, brutal, though I kinda guess this weather comes as a shock to the system. Not an excuse!!!!

Despite this start I still like Kelly, but wow, this start is rough. 4 straight lead off walk and right as I type that Rizzo gets a triple to bring in another run. 0-3 Cubs in the 4th.

Yet another walk, still in the 4th. Pull him or keep him out? Looks like we’re committed to ride this wave (at least through this inning) since it’s the first game of the series. God help us all.

STILL in the 4th and Kelly issues another walk and it looks like Torey has seen enough. Bye Kelly.

Oh joy, Kelly’s been replaced by Koch........who somehow gets out of the inning without another run. Madness.

Beer 3: Tiki Fractals by Belching Beaver

Maybe this ale will signal hope. Maybe not. We’ll see.

Nope, I guess not. Offense fails again in the 5th and on and on we go. Not how I hoped my Friday would start.

Wow. Koch with a 1-2-3 inning. Never thought I’d see it. Hope? Is that you? Still 0-3 going in to the 6th.

Still no hope for our bats at least, honestly think this weather is messing with us. Looking at the forecast and it’s a balmy 46 with 26mph winds from the north. That sounds miserable to be outside in for more than a few minutes much less a whole game.

Koch’s watch has apparently ended as the Chicago winter overtakes him in the 6th after he allows a hit and plunks Rizzo. He proceeds to fail at life and we’re now at 0-5 and hope is gone.

Beer 4: Southern Hemisphere DIPA by Tombstone

Walker keeps walking hard as he almost breaks Hendricks’ ankle on a comebacker in the 7th. Luckily Hendricks is fine, and unluckily neither Marte nor Ahmed can capitalize on this misfortune. 0-5 Cubs in the bottom of the 7th

Koch’s still out there, so I’m guessing Torey has conceded this game, which is honestly the best move for today at the start of a series. Not thrilled but get it.

No offense again in the 8th and just a little noise in the 9th, putting the score at 1-5 but it’s over after that. Hope you all have a happy Easter after that game

Bells and whistles (and GIFs!), by Jim

[Click to enlarge, at Fangraphs.com]
Hurricanes (the drink): Ketel Marte, +3.2%
Hurricanes (the destructive natural phenomena): Merrill Kelly, -17.4%

Yes, this was largely a sucky game. No fewer than eleven free passes handed out by Koch and Kelly, nine walks and two hit batters. Meanwhile, we let Kyle Kendricks smash his previous personal best for strikeouts. Still, we did get a several amusing clips of D-backs falling over and struggling to deal with the wind. So there’s that.

Present in the Gameday Thread were: AZPerson, AzCutter, AzDbackfanInDc, BobDolio, CA_Yankee_Fan, Craig’s City Counsell, DBacksEurope, GuruB, Jack Sommers, Jim McLennan, JoeCB1991, Johnneu, Makakilo, Michael McDermott, MikeMono, MrMrrbi, Oldenschoole, Rockkstarr12, Schilling2001, kilnborn, onedotfive and ponus. Nothing got more than two recs, so we’ll move rapidly on... to the same two teams playing at the same place again tomorrow. Another morning game; let’s just hope for less of a literal blast from the elements. Zack Greinke faces Yu Darvish there.