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Diamondbacks 3, Phillies 1: Shelby Goes Sweep All Over Philly

Shelby Miller's first start off the DL was more than acceptable, and the Diamondbacks did enough in the first to cruise to a four-game sweep against the Phillies

Hunter Martin/Getty Images

Shelby Miller came back from his Disabled List stint against the Phillies, and with the way they're playing it may as well have been another rehab start. He pitched 6 and 2/3 innings with 1 Earned Run, 5 Hits, 5 Strikeouts, and only a singular Walk. It may not have been the best test, but it's a hell of a lot better to see him do that then have his hand amputated because of another mound scraping incident.

Jeremy Hellickson was the Phillies starting pitcher. He may remember him from such 2015 Diamondbacks memories as This Game Is Taking Too Long and Moar Like Jeremy Smellickson. He pitched fairly well, except for the first inning, and that wasn't enough so ha ha.

Jean Segura lead off the game with a double. Phil Gosselin singled to score him. Jake Lamb homered almost off his face to make the score 3-0. Here's an embedded video of said homer.

It could have been a shutout, except that Socrates Brito, recently called up from Triple-A, misplayed a ball hit off the bat of Tyler Goeddel to score a runner from third with two outs in the 2nd to make it 3-1. I would also embed that highlight, but the Phillies twitter account isn't as tech savvy and I can't from, because they're run by a bunch of octogenarian sea bass.

And... that was it offensively for either team. Miller got into some trouble in the seventh and was lifted for Tyler Clippard, who got out of the jam. Daniel Hudson pitched a clean eighth. Brad Ziegler got into a little trouble in the last frame, thanks to a single and Nick Ahmed taking way too big a sip of a Mango Tango eegee and having a brain freeze on a possible double play ball, but Ziggy got out of it to record his (INSERT NUMBER HERE I SHOULD LOOK THIS UP IT'S LIKE 40-SOMETHING?) straight save.

Also apparently there were nuns, and people were like "ZOMG NUNS CAN'T DRINK BEER" which is silly because Catholics are down with that, and you'll be really shocked to learn that Monks sometimes make wine.

So yeah, that's the game in a nutshell... Maybe I should pad. I was outside for a bit of the day and it was unpleasent, when I got home to start writing this recap I basked in AC for a little bit first, I thought I was having heat stroke when I saw a picture of Gwen Stefani on the homepage. Turns out she's just performing at the All-Star Game. So it's good we're sucking up to Gen-Xers now instead of Baby Boomers for sports music stuff.

Source: FanGraphs

Climbing Every Mountain: Miller, +25.9%
16 Going On 17 I Will Take Care - LOL JK Imma Nazi: Welington Castillo, -5.3%

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Diamondbacks go to Toronto tomorrow for a two-game series. First pitch for both games is 7 after the hour because Canada is super weird like that.