Diamondbacks 12, Cardinals 7: Patting the dirt with a shovel

So you think the Diamondbacks might have a hangover worthy of two shotgunned bottles of $3 Wine from Walgreens (before clearance), but it turns out they didn't... eventually. There are things to worry about with this game, mostly revolving around why Zack Greinke doesn't like pitching at home, but for one half-inning, everything was pretty awesome and that was ridden to victory.

Zack Greinke continued a worrying trend of Diamondbacks pitchers at home surrendering two runs in the first inning, though aided somewhat by David Peralta having his understudy Mark Trumbo out in Right Field for that inning on a ball hit by Matt Holliday at the wall that probably should have been caught but turned into a triple because the Diamondbacks are a shady debt reduction agency for baserunner advancement sometimes I guess.

The Diamondbacks got one run back in the 2nd thanks to the rare RBI strikeout by Chris Owings that allowed Yasmany Tomas (owner of an 11 game hit streak) to score thanks to a passed ball courtesy of Jaime Garcia and Yadier Molina.,

WELL ACTUALLY IT 'S NOT AN RBI IF...

Shut the f*** up, nobody likes you italicized straw-man.

The Diamondbacks tied the game up in the 4th when a Chris Owings groundout that scored Tomas, again. However, the Cardinals took the lead again on a Stephen Piscotty hit off the glove of Greinke. This got worse as Jeremy Hazelbaker, who's apparently a real person, homered the next at-bat to make it 5-2 (though after a review to see if a fan interfered.)

The Diamondbacks did the thing where they scored in the 6th when David Peralta lined a triple over the head of a flailing Randal Grichuk, who will be receiving this for his performance on that play

Garcia was lifted for Matt Bowman, who gave up a single to Owings to make it 5-4 Cardinals. Zack Greinke got a hit after faking a bunt to bring runners to first and second with no out. After Nick Ahmed struck out (swinging, thankfully, so no having to put Rubby De La Rosa at catcher or anything) Bowman was pulled for Kevin Siegrist to face Jean Segura. Jean Segura responded to this by blasting a three-run homer to left to make it 7-5. A Brandon Drury single and Paul Goldschmidt walk ensured Siegrist getting no outs in his appearance tonight. Seth Manness came in to face Tomas, who hit a ground rule double to score Drury and make is 8-5.

New paragraph now because this inning is long. Welington Castillo came up and drove in two more runs on a single to make it 10-5 and start possibly patting the dirt on the Cardinals. Adding insult to hilarity, David Peralta got on base from a probably-should-have-been double play ball that Kolten Wong booted. Chris Owings had his second RBI single of the inning to make it 11-5. That was all the scoring that inning, but 9 runs is pretty good I think. I am willing to hear differing opinions.

Greinke came out for the 7th and got two outs but then gave up a homer to Matt Carpenter.

Oh yeah, he was kinda bad tonight, huh. Oh as I typed that Hazelbfhasjufheuiofhoaihfiueher drove in another run to make it 11-7.. GETTIN KINDA SQUIFFY. Greinke was pulled for Andrew Chafin. Chafin walked Bradon Moss but got Grichuk to pop out to stem the bleeding. He also pitched a clean 8th. Good Andrew, nice kitty.

Rickie Weeks II made it 12-7 on an RBI double that scored Chris Owings. Enrique Burgos came on for the 9th and struck out the side for the win, and the Diamondbacks already have more wins against the Cardinals than they did last year.

Segura finished #ATripleShy of the cycle, so that's cool. Other notes of interest? THE CARDINALS GOT CURB STOMPED FOR ONE INNING AND IT WAS GLORIOUS.

COTN goes to Hax for this:

Cardinals are fundamentally sound...

like a loud fart

This is just the beginning

by Diamondhacks on Apr 25, 2016 | 9:21 PM reply unrec (6) actions

Hah, fart.

Anyway, Carlos Martinez takes on Shelby Miller tomorrow.