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Diamondbacks 1, Padres 8: It's hard to win a game

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In which your pinch-hitting quick recapper doesn't watch the game, opens up the boxscore on MLB.com and OH MY GD WHAT HAPPENED HERE

The Dark Lord
The Dark Lord
Matt Kartozian-USA TODAY Sports

It's hard to win a game when you only score one run.

It's hard to win a game when you give up 8 runs.

It's hard to win a game when you give up 10 hits and another 4 walks, and also commit an error as well.

It's hard to win a game when your starter doesn't make it through 6 innings.

It's hard to win a game when you have Addison Reed on your roster, and then you use him in a game.

It's hard to win a game when Addison Reed gives up 4 runs in a less than a full inning of work.

It's hard to win a game when you hear a trade goes down that dumps a top rated prospect.

It's hard to win a game when you realize you've been catching up on Game of Thrones instead of managing the game.

It's hard to win a game when you go to ask for more lives in Candy Crush and realize you're on the wrong tab and accept a trade from the Braves.

It's hard to win a game when you're using freshly caught salmon as bats and raw, whole chickens for baseball gloves.

It's hard to win a game.