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Diamondbacks 7, Marlins 6: In this story the Marlins are a metaphor for Hemingway's fading career

What follows is a recap written by someone who CERTAINLY WATCHED THE GAME.

Ender is confused as why there are no photos available in the editor for today's game yet.
Ender is confused as why there are no photos available in the editor for today's game yet.
Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

If only the Diamondbacks could play series against teams that had just switched their GM into the manager role all the time.

Arizona went into the game knowing it already had the series win, having taken the first three games, and was looking to complete the sweep. They certainly accomplished that, but they didn't have an easy go of it.

The top of the first things seemed so easy, with Ender Inciarte getting on base and then getting driven home by Yasmany Tomas' double. It wasn't a lead that lasted for long, though, as the Marlins struck back with 3 runs of their own in the home part of the first.

The Diamondbacks took back in the lead in the sixth, with Tomas again being involved. He led things off with a single, and moved to second on a wild pitch. Mark Trumbo got on base with a walk, and then Tomas scored on a Jordan Pacheco sac fly. Chad Pennington joined in on the action to double home Trumbo, putting the score at 4-4. The D-backs weren't done, though, and scored two more runs to finally take the lead again (and get tacos!) at 6-4.

Once again, though, the Marlins didn't wait long to respond. Randall Delgado was the call to the bullpen, and he, uh, didn't do so well. He gave up 2 runs to tie the game again on 3 singles and a walk.

Arizona would have the last laugh, though, taking the lead for good in the eighth with some luck. Pacheco started the inning walk, then was moved over on a Pennington infield single. Paul Goldschmidt, who had had the day off up to this point, came up as the pinch hitter and hit a single to load the bases. Inciarte tried to get Pacheco home with a fly out to right field, but Pacheco got himself thrown out like a dang idiot. AJ Pollock had just about enough of this nonsense, and got himself an infield single to score Pennington to take the lead, and effectively win the game.

Not a very effective start for Archie Bradley, going only 5 innings and giving up 4 runs on 9 hits and 2 walks. He did strike out 4, though.

Mat Latos was actually bad, though, for the Marlins. He went a little longer with 5.1 innings but also gave up 6 runs on 7 hits.

Source: FanGraphs

Almond Joys: Chad Pennington (35.5%)
Butterfingers: Brad Ziegler (18.4%), AJ Pollock (18%)
Pay Days: Randall Delgado (-33.8%)
Snickers: Archie Bradley (-23.9%), David Peralta (-20.7%)

So there you have it. Busy Gameday Thread given the time of day, so I presume there were some offices and schools with Diamondbacks fans who didn't get jack done this morning. Shame on you! 619 total comments, with James Attwood leading the way with 152 by himself. He was joined by: AzDbackfanInDc, BIGredmc, Clefo, DbacksSkins, DeadmanG, GuruB, Jim McLennan, JoeCB1991, JoelPre, MrMrrbi, Muu, PhxSunsFan4Life, Xerostomia, Xipooo, azsportsfan31, cheese1213, coldblueAZ, david.munter, ford.williams.10, freeland1787, hotclaws, onedotfive, piratedan7, rd33, and xmet.

Comment of the Game goes to onedotfive:

4 game sweep!

Not one shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.

The Diamondbacks head home for a short stay, having a 3 game series with the Cubs before jetting away again. First pitch tomorrow is 6:40pm Arizona Time, so be sure to tune into make fun of delusional Cubs frat dudes.