The Week in Diamondbacks Tweets

Tweet of the Week

Sad Clayton Kershaw is the best Clayton Kershaw #BeatLA

— Joe Cortez (@JDCortez_14) April 12, 2015

Honorable mentions

Silly photo... pic.twitter.com/NGjBAvIywW

— Visalia Rawhide (@VisaliaRawhide) April 8, 2015

FINE. I'll write more. pic.twitter.com/PsZ2mwzxRt

— soco (@socosoco) April 14, 2015

If LA Times readers are confused by tomorrow's game story, it'll be 'cause @dylanohernandez ate a Churro Dog and passed out on his keyboard.

— Zach Buchanan (@azc_zachb) April 12, 2015

And, a Tweet that was subsequently deleted, but not before I screenshot it.

Hey, I laughed.

The games in Diamondbacks Tweets

Diamondbacks 7, Giants 6

it may be warmups, but rubby de la rosa couldn't even hit tuffy on a consistent basis

— steven burt (@stevenburt) April 8, 2015

@AZSnakepit on just a pinch hit and one start. MVP trophy locked up

— Ross Dunham (@RDunham22) April 8, 2015

What, no #slaphands?

Sorry guys... Not used to running in and tweeting it after coming in from the bullpen...

— Daniel Hudson (@DHuddy41) April 8, 2015

Diamondbacks 2, Giants 5

I don't want to say Hellickson works slow but the grounds crew is going to have to mow the lawn between each inning.

— Jeff Summers (@azjazzyj) April 9, 2015

Don’t worry, Heston. 50 Cent’s pitch was still worse than that.

— Diamondback Fans (@DbackFans) April 9, 2015

Any Tweet that quote Burns automatically gets a spot here.

So Machi would rather have #Dbacks Cliff Pennington on the bases than Aaron Hill. As Robbie Burns said, the best laid plans gang aft a-gley

— Jack Magruder (@JackMagruder) April 9, 2015

Diamondbacks 4, Dodgers 3

Opposing pitchers with the same amount of letters in their names face each other first in the same inning and both strike out! @Dbacks

— Frank Rubio (@_FrankRubio) April 11, 2015

When you trying to watch the Dbacks game but Native is playing the Yankees game on 4 TVs and golf on the other 3

— Lucky Leah (@soto_leah) April 11, 2015

It wouldn't be an Addison Reed outing if you weren't sitting on the edge of your seat biting your nails #Dbacks

— Clay (@ClayJParker) April 11, 2015

Diamondbacks 6, Dodgers 0

@ArchieBradley7 I didn't know you could swing it too #GoDbacks

— Touki Toussaint™ (@_YoSoy_Touki) April 12, 2015

Dodger Third Basemen are Spinal Tap drummers in this game.

— Charlie Gebow (@CLEFOAINTACRIME) April 12, 2015

Metal detectors go in at Chase Field and all of sudden the Dodgers can't win. Coincidence? I think not. #dbacks

— Samuel Richard (@samuelisaac) April 12, 2015

Diamondbacks 4, Dodgers 7

She can pitch overhand too. pic.twitter.com/JqhQX3XiFJ

— Arizona Diamondbacks (@Dbacks) April 12, 2015

even when he's arguing Goldy is nice. "that's off. that's way off. okay then"

— steven burt (@stevenburt) April 12, 2015

Wavers behind home plate should be immediately ejected and banned from Chase Field forever. #Dbacks

— Austin (@Austin5Fe) April 12, 2015

Diamondbacks 8, Padres 4

The #Padres' GM looks like he belongs in Game of Thrones

— DESIGNING PLANES MAN (@placovara) April 14, 2015

Ender Inciarte > Justin Upton? Discuss. @InsidetheZona

— Ryan P. Morrison (@ryanpmorrison) April 14, 2015

Ender Inciarte's night: double-double-single-triple sounds like the greatest In-N-Out burger of all time

— Josh Kelman (@JoshKelman) April 14, 2015

The week in McCarthy Tweets

I thought long and hard over whether to continue curating the best McCarthyisms, given he's no longer a Diamondback. It was one thing to continue to follow him when he'd been traded to the Yankees - that wasn't his fault - but signing with the Dodgers of you own free will is almost inexcusable. I feel sure that very act removed the last vestige of humanity from his being, leaving him nothing but a hateful, soulless automaton.

my wife is out for the night and I have 2 questions: Tinder-is it free? & how do you cook food?

— Brandon McCarthy (@BMcCarthy32) March 12, 2015

Oh, all right then...

"you are a short fat black woman" would have been more applicable to me than this 'fortune' I just got pic.twitter.com/FMeDQvkECt

— Brandon McCarthy (@BMcCarthy32) April 5, 2015

"who ya gonna call?" "I dunno. Whichever Ghostbusters has the best yelp reviews I suppose."

— Brandon McCarthy (@BMcCarthy32) March 10, 2015

Which is a great segue into this final thought...

Historical events in Tweets

Lincoln was shot 150 years ago today and that reminds me of the greatest Yelp review, ever. pic.twitter.com/gcBQ2I1nTm

— Ericson (@MrScottEricson) April 14, 2015