Record: 26-36. Pace: 68-94. Change over last year: -9.
I'm not one of those perfect PTA Pinterest parents. Parenting can be frustrating, especially when you have a two year old running around, trying to get his grubby little fingers on everything. I thought I'd give a little glimpse into why my recaps read as if I'm reading it off ESPN's Gameday after the fact. If you want a more traditional recap, I'll direct your attention to the quick recap.
- Henry, stop hitting your sister
- No, this rice is for your lunch tomorrow. You already had rice.
- Time to turn on the TV, wait, we're already up by 2 runs?
- Prado didn't hit into a GIDP, WHAT A SHOCKER
- Ah ffffffffff, Charlie Blackmon hit a home run. This is going to be a long game.
- My son is mad at me, so he's taking off his socks.
- Boring draft stuff
- Oh look at that, vomit is on my shoulder
- Miggy time!!!
- Arroyo is bunting now, I think I missed something.
- D-backs get another run but of course Parra gets immediately thrown out the plate. Sure, might not have been completely his fault, but let me have my narrative.
- But wait! Replay!
- No, wait, never mind, still out.
- Stupid Tulo gets a double.
- Cuddyer real mad about that strikeout. Sit yo smelf down.
- Goldy home run starts things right, doing the Singles Ladies dance up in here
- Arroyo gives up another double, RBI from LeMaheiu (???) to make it 5-2
- Blackmon walks, and then a double steal, because of course
- Nice scoop by Prado on a screaming liner to save a couple runs
- Peralta with a lead off double, lolBlackmon and the ball clanking off his glove
- Apparently didn't miss anything while getting my son to brush his teeth
- Arroyo hitting a single? Madness!
- Parra RBI double meansTACOS!!!
- Owings getting in on the fun with a sac fly, 7-2 now
- Ah dammit, Tulo gets a solo home run
- 'Dinger, the front running mascot' - yeah, screw that guy!
- Maybe Arroyo might be slowing down, gives up a double to Cuddyer
- Oh wait, Whataburger commercial time, I guess he got out of it
- Bottom 7th, man on 2nd, not the disaster I was expecting while I put my son to bed
- Nice throw by Montero, but not in time and the run still scores to make it 7-4
- Drew A Barrel Roll! on the steal
- Now Tulo walks, I'm getting nervous
- Big Baby, I hate you.
- Ground out to Goldy yeeeeeeeeah!
- Chavez with a walk, I bet this is the only interesting thing this inning
- Or not: 2 run homer for Chris Owings
- And then an inside the park home run for the Rockies? ffffffffffff
- Miggy with a hit, I wish this game was over
- Other stuff happened, I dunno the score is 12-7 now or something
- Great leaping catch by Peralta to steal one from Tulo
- Win! Sweep! EAT THE CURB, ROCKIES