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SnakeBytes 5/29: Never Do the Dishes

No game yesterday, so I'd like to use this space to remind you to never do the dishes, ever. You're better off avoiding that filthy enterprise altogether. This is America, we have machines to do that stuff. No need to subject your delicate digits to the dangerous combination of warm water and suds.

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USA TODAY Sports

Quotes of the Day

“I’m sure he’ll be more careful next time, or he’ll make his wife do it. I think a lot of people just put their dishes in the dishwasher.”

- Kirk Gibson on Ian Kennedy's fluke injury

Diamondbacks News

Arizona Diamondbacks pitcher Ian Kennedy proves home is no safe haven from injuries

Injuries happen. Even professional athletes get injured doing stupid, mundane things. Eric Chavez, however, laughs in your frail face. Chavez, always one to push the envelope, tempts fate regularly, telling Sarah McLellan, “I jump on the trampoline at home with my kids all the time.” His taste for danger unquenched, Chavez went on to report that “I’ve even put my hand in a blender like straight down." Like. Straight. Down.

Will Ian Kennedy Be The Odd Man Out In Arizona? | FanGraphs Baseball

If you've got to have a problem, too many pitchers is a great one to have. Thanks to Towers, Dipoto and Byrnes, the Diamondbacks have glut of capable starters. With Tyler Skaggs impressing in his 2013 debut and Daniel Hudson set to come back from injury around the all-star break, the "problem" may be coming to a head. With Kennedy set to make a healthy amount in arbitration next year, IPK's time in Sedona red may be coming to an end.

Looking at early contenders for Rookie of the Year. | SportsonEarth.com

Didi Gregorious is getting a bit of national love for his stellar performance thus far, unfortunately a guy name Matt Harvey is getting a bit of attention over in New York which may hurt the young shortstop's chances for garnering much rookie of the year attention.

Didi Gregorius vs. Derek Jeter, Importantly | FanGraphs Baseball

Speaking of Didi, Fangraphs finally tackled the age-old Didi Gregorious or Derek Jeter question. The article is not entirely serious, but absolutely worth a look.

Archie Bradley ranked ninth-best MLB prospect by ESPN insider ArizonaSports.com

Keith Law had the following to say about Archie Bradley:

"Bradley always had ace-quality stuff, with a fastball up to 98 mph and a curveball from hell, but his control troubles last year appear to be behind him. He has walked just more than 10 percent of hitters this year after walking more than 14 percent of them last year. Diamondbacks fans should be gritty -- I mean, giddy -- over the prospect of a rotation with Bradley, Pat Corbin, Tyler Skaggs, Wade Miley and Daniel Hudson by Opening Day of 2015."

Around the League

What happened to Dustin Ackley? Sabermetrics, of course! - Baseball Nation

The tone of the article is a bit off-putting, but Eric Wedge's assertion -- that Dustin Ackley's struggles can be attributed to hyper-selectivity at the plate, which can in turn be attributed to sabermetrics(?) -- might have deserved the flippant response from Rob Neyer.

The necessary scam of the amateur draft - Baseball Nation

Grant Brisbee defends the current draft system against a writer's recent proposal to do away with the draft after the first ten picks.

When Stars And Scrubs Doesn’t Work | FanGraphs Baseball

The NBA strategy of signing a star player or two and then surrounding him with fungible veterans and no-name youngsters doesn't translate to major league baseball. Dave Cameron cites the 2013 Milwaukee Brewers -- who remain objectively terribly despite employing two of the top ten players by WAR -- to support the proposition that down-roster players are vitally important to a team's success. Say what you will about the man, but Kevin Tower's roster-building philosophy embodies Cameron's premise that "what separates a good team from a bad team is often not the quality at the top of the roster, but the quality at the bottom of the roster."

Marginalia

On Facebook, Rays Prospect Brags About Throwing Change At A Stripper

Before you go casting your judgments, just know that those fifty cents Josh Sale threw at a stripper were actually the last bit of his bonus money. Joke's on you, universe.