Rangers 9, Diamondbacks 1: D'Backs Victims Of Ranger Rager.

So those warm and fuzzy feelings we had after the last two series? Those were nice. We all felt very cocky about ourselves and such? Tonight was like after beating up on Dan and Birdie, you suddenly had to fight Sagat and you were like "AWWW MAN" and then you threw your controller across the room after five straight minutes of blocking Tiger Shots.

Ian Kennedy did not match the previous start he had after procreation, which might lead to some awkward family conversation down the road. The Rangers showed us that their offense is actually pretty good thank you for asking. The D'Backs showed that having the DH at your disposal does not necessarily begat offense.

A few streaks ended tonight, and a not-fun time was had by all.

Texas got things started in their half of the 1st. Ian Kinsler, who went to Canyon Del Oro High School in Oro Valley (I live in that school district, see if I vote for your bonds again! IT'S YOUR FAULT, KINSLER), got a leadoff double down the line just past the outstretched glove of Josh Bell. He got to third on one of those productive outs the booth likes to talk about, and made it home on a very poorly timed wild pitch. (All wild pitches are poorly time, this one especially).

Through five and 33% innings COLBY LEWIS HAD A PERFECT GAME. DID YOU KNOW THAT? COLBY LEWIS HAD A PERFECT GAME IT WAS SO PERFECT until Aaron Hill lined one to left to break that nonesense up. Nothing came of it though, as Josh Bell grounded into the rare "Tag then throw to first" double play.

The lack of offense on the D'Backs part was compounded by a two out, two run homer by David Murphy in the bottom of the 6th. People often cite Coors, Reno, The Moon etc. as launching Pads, but 325 in right field is shorter than some parks in Backyard Baseball.That made it a seemingly, at this point, insurmountable lead for the Rangers. Yorvit Torrealba singled and Mitch Moreland doubled him home to make it 4-0.

But then, some hope for the future! Craig Gentry popped one up! Two outs! It could end this! The D'Backs could go into the next inning down, but not out! Lol no. The ball tracked into the no-man's land between first and right field, and Goldy took a valiant stab at it, but it fell to make it 5-0 in favor of Texas. Kinsler then nubbed one off the end of the bat to make it 6-0. I'll mention again that all of the Rangers damage came with two outs, which will cause Mark Grace to not shut up about that for another two weeks. Gibby came with the slow hook and took Kennedy out. Brad Ziegler came in and got the final out, finally.

The Ranger train kept chugging in the next inning. Ziegler let the first two guys up get on base, and so Gibson brought in Mike Zagurski, and things went swimmingly, by that I mean he walked the bases loaded, gave up a single and hit Craig Gentry to make the score more lopsided.

In a moment of "But other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?", Miguel Montero broke up the the shutout with a solo shot in the 8th. Before that, Paul Goldschmidt came inches within a homer himself. Alas, Josh Hamilton caught it at the wall. With that, Goldy's hit streak went farewell. It will be missed. It was like 5,000 Candles In The Wind.

Texas added one more in the 8th, and the D'Backs went meekly into the 9th. The Diamondbacks snapped a five game winning streak and fell under .500.

The people in the thread tonight were: Rockkstarr12, since_98, imstillhungry95, grimmy01, hotclaws, txzona, Clefo, AzDbackfanInDc, snakecharmer, Bryn21, piratedan7, Zavada's Moustache, asteroid, dbacks25, luckycc, rd33, jjwaltrip, onedotfive, Jim McLennan, dbacks79, BattleMoses, shoewizard, 4 Corners Fan, Joel Preston, $-The Moneyman-$, PR151, Circa4life, Augdogs, Backin'the'Backs, CaptainCanuck, PatrickPetersonAZ, soco, Marc Fournier

If you can't guess who had the most posts, I want to play poker with you.

COTN goes to $-The Moneyman-$ for this piece of zen:

When going against Josh Bell

by $-The Moneyman-$ on Jun 12, 2012 6:30 PM MST up reply actions 4 recs

Hopefully the D'Backs can get back on track tomorrow. Wade Miley inherits the stopper role yet again. We will see you tomorrow, unless we don't.