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AZ SnakePit Fantasy Baseball, Week 12

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Results

AZ SnakePit 10, Desert Dingleberries 0 In a stunning upset, the first clean-sweep of the year went to bottom-placed SnakePit, who blew Dingle out of the water across the board. Some categories were close - Snake took WHIP by just 0.03 - but even a .345 average couldn't save Dingle, as Snake batted .361, behind Roberts' .538. Sexson had 4 HR for them.

dbacktom 4, GregSchulteOverdrive 5 A single K proved the margin of victory here, the point thus earned giving Greg the win. Zambrano had 12 plus a W for them, countering ten from Lilly for tom. Greg's ERA and WHIP were an excellent 2.79 and 1.06, but tom did better in hitting, with Ramirez and Ibanez the only hitters to get more than one homer.

The Fighting Amish 9, Baked 1 Baked sunk to last place after this game, taking only K's, 35-24, with a win and ten K's for Gorzelanny their best performance. Otherwise, it was all Amish: Kendrick scored 10 runs, while Crisp homered three times, and Saito's single save was enough to give them victory there as well.

4 K's 4 Gonzo 7, CoJack Forever 2 CoJack were crippled, without a SS or Util player, which allowed Gonzo to come one SB short of complete offensive dominance. Soriano had four homers and Guillen 11 RBI's for them. Beckett (CoJack) made the pitching more even, getting two wins and 11 K's, to provide CoJack's only scores.

Crazy VIII's 6, 7-2 Offsuiters 2 VIII's returned to the top, piling up 47 K's behind Peavy and Verlander, who both reached double-figures. Offensively, honors were even: Griffey (VIII) hit three homers, more than the rest of the team put together, but Howard (Off) had seven runs and eight RBI. SB and W were both split at three each.

Bob Melvin Sucks 4, Tucson Myth 5 Truly a game of two halves. Bob were one HR short of sweeping hitting, but a horrible week on the mound, where their team ERA was 8.45, allowed Tucson to come back by taking all five pitching points. Their arms won seven games, with Maine's 2 W and 10 K's the top return. Konerko (Bob) had two HR.

BBTNG 7, Webby17 2 BBTNG took advantage of Webb's weakness on the mound, where they had no wins and only 14 K's. Dice-K's win and 9 K's were almost enough by themselves for BBTNG. Neither team lit up the scoreboard at the plate, with Phillips' (BBTNG) three homers most notable. No-one scored or drove in more than five runs.

Chupacabras 3, Kapsaicin Kids 6 Kids overcame a lack of power (2 HR, 12 RBI) and benefited from a weak showing by Chupa: one win, a 4.71 ERA and 21 runs were enough for Kids. Cabrera's 6 RBI for Chupa was the best return for either side, while James W and 8 K's helped Kids to a decisive edge on the mound, despite two 13.50 ERAs.

Douchebaggery 6, warlords 2 Douche won the televised game, keeping the pressure on the leaders, though this was closer than the final score looks: six categories all told were decided by two points or less. Byrnes' 7 run, 7 RBI week for Douche was best at the plate, while Cordero (war), Papelbon and Fuentes (both Douche) had two saves each.

The Don Quixotes 7, Shenanigans 2 Don rolled to an easy win, with a well-balanced performance. Gonzo has 6 runs and 8 RBI for Shena, and they had the best pitcher too (Young, W + 11 K's) but they badly-lacked support. Don had no-one with more than one HR or 5 RBI, but took both categories. Gregg also had three saves for them.

Standings

 1. Crazy VIII's         67-40-13  -
 2. Douchebaggery        69-44-7   1
 3. 4 K's 4 Gonzo        66-42-12  1.5
 4. The Fighting Amish   64-47-9   5
 5. warlords             64-47-9   5
 6. dbacktom             62-47-11  6
 7. Bob Melvin Sucks     59-46-15  7
 8. Kapsaicin Kids       60-51-9   9
 9. GregSchulteOverdrive 60-52-8   9.5
10. Desert Dingleberries 57-57-6  13.5
11. The Don Quixotes     54-55-11 14
12. Shenanigans          52-57-11 16
13. CoJack Forever       51-61-8  18.5
14. BBTNG                50-61-9  19
15. Chupacabras          49-60-11 19
16. 7-2 Offsuiters       47-63-10 21.5
17. AZ SnakePit          48-68-4  23.5
18. Tucson Myth          43-68-9  26
19. Webby17              42-67-11 26
20. Baked                39-70-11 29  

This week's games

AZ SnakePit vs. Chupacabras
dbacktom vs. Desert Dingleberries
The Fighting Amish vs. GregSchulteOverdrive
4 K's 4 Gonzo vs. Baked
Crazy VIII's vs. CoJack Forever
Bob Melvin Sucks vs. 7-2 Offsuiters
BBTNG vs. Tucson Myth
Douchebaggery vs. Kapsaicin Kids
The Don Quixotes vs. warlords
Shenanigans vs. Webby17

Douchebaggery are on the ESPN game of the week again, this time taking on the Kapsaicin Kids. Douche's strength continues to be their pitching: at the plate, they have no better than a 6-6 record in any category. But on the mound, they are undefeated in saves, and are 10-2 for both WHIP and ERA. Kids are no slouches in ERA, going 8-4 there, and have posted winning records in most hitting categories. They may be regretting benching Sosa, however, as he pitched six innings of one-run ball today.