The Banana reports, "Ortiz flaw detected." Sadly, the flaw in question is not, "Paying $33m based on a pitcher's wins is a bad idea." It's the more mundane, "His body gets out ahead of his arm and it affects his release point and his ability to command his stuff." More snarky fans than I will suggest, it might perhaps help, if there were less of his body to get out ahead. Ortiz says, "This is where we're at right now, getting into a position where I can get to where I need to be. We're all working on the same page to make that happen." No word on whether Tony Clark's hand was stuck up Ortiz, moving the lips...
So, which Claudio Vargas will show up at Chase Field tonight?
Home: 6 IP, 16 H, 5 BB, 5 K, 11 ER
Road: 13 IP, 6 H, 1 BB, 10 K, 0 ER
Given this striking disparity, I have a vision of Vargas clinging on to a doorpost at San Francisco Airport, shrieking "Noooooooo!" as the team head for their flight back to Arizona. But it'll need to be Good Vargas who shows up, if we're to have a chance of beating Brad Penny, another in the "Could have been a Diamondback" series of pitchers.
But as today is supposed to be the 'Day Without an Immigrant', maybe Claudio will show solidarity with his Latino brothers and not turn up at Chase. If that were the case, it'd decimate our pitching staff: 4/5 of our starting rotation were born outside the US [Batista, Cruz and Vargas from the Dominican Republic, plus Hernandez from Cuba]. Add Aquino, Valverde and Vizcaino - all DR too - and it'd be kinda quiet in the bullpen too. In contrast, all our position players are US-born. Though I note, with amusement and respect, that this covers everything from Afro-tastic Tony Clark, to good ol' boy Brandon Webb, via Luis Gonzalez. God Bless America!
Heck, maybe I should take the day off, as an immigrant myself - see how you cope without British sarcasm for the day! Naw, can't do that. My team needs me. :-)