A Full Metal Beercap: Dbacks 4 Giants  1

Christian Petersen

This will be the most metal recap EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Record: 32-45. Pace: 67-95. Change on 2013/2010/2004: -9/+2/+5

Welcome, to the most metal recap ever!!!!!!!!!


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Nathan Explosion plays to win

Beer 1:  Homebrew (English Style Brown) by Turambar

  • Missed both the first and second innings thanks to my buddy and I speaking of beer back at my place.  Enjoyed my most recent homebrew, which is decent in my opinion, though it didn't score anywhere near where it needed to for a competition I entered it into.  25pts out of 50.......sigh
  • Shockingly we're down despite Timmeh pitching against our own Metal God Goldy.  0-1
  • The box score says Panda got a triple, but that would be physically impossible.  Unless of course he can bend space and time........

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Dio is magic though, and would have no problem hitting a triple.

Beer 2:  Pilsner Urquell Czech Pilsner by Plzensky Prazdroj

  • Normally not my beverage of choice but Papago is trying to get another fresh cask of Urquell flown in like they did last year.  Vote for Papago Brewing Company!!!!  http://draftmag.com/pilsner/agegate.php#vote
  • Realized that riding my bike for these recaps, while wise, is much harder to do in this summer heat.
  • Collmenter makes things interesting in the top of the 3rd, but keeps on rocking without any blood given.
  • You may be asking yourself "Turambar, why the metal theme?"  To which I will respond "because I can."
  • Someone really should tell Timmeh that if you can't grow a stache then you really shouldn't try.

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Papa Emeritus II does not approve of Timmeh's mustache.

Beer 3:  Arrogant Bastard American Strong Ale by Stone Brewing Co.

  • A beer with an attitude on both the label and in the bottle.  A high gravity American Strong Ale with enough of a hop bite to make you think of an IPA, but enough maltyness to make you think otherwise.
  • Walking Goldy.  Might be the first time Timmeh has make the right choice when Goldy is at bat......
  • but Timmeh's "wisdom" comes back to haunt him as Aaron Hill comes through for us.  1-1
  • Prado, who is still kinda bugging all of us with his play this season, comes through with a double!!!  2-1
  • At 91 pitches Collmenter does appear to be a bit tired, the 1st out comes off a very very very long popup towards the pool.  Makes me a bit nervous.
  • This umpire's strike zone appears to be interesting...but at least helpful that inning. 
  • After the top of the 5th it's still 2-1 Dbacks and I very much doubt Collmenter will pitch in the 6th.
  • Fun fact time.  Jim Carrey, being a big death metal fan, personally requested to have Cannibal Corpse appear in Ace Ventura.

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Yup, one of the most brutal death metal bands ever was in a movie many of us saw as a kid.

Beer 4:  Avery IPA by Avery Brewing

  • Yup, I just got to get my IPA fix
  • Owings got greedy on that, way way way way too greedy.  Easy out at home, but........ I guess the new rules just don't apply about the catcher being unable to block the plate before having he ball????
  • Inciarte does score though...which is nice  3-1 Dbacks
  • Perez is in now for the top of the 6th and I am starting to become a fan of this umps strike zone.  3-1 going into the bottom of the 6th.
  • Hmmm.  The TV just informed me that Aaron Hill also loves batting practice again Timmeh.
  • Goldy, once again, loves him some Timmeh pitching.
  • Hill doesn't quite prove the TV right, but he drives in a run.  4-1

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Metal album covers are just so .......metal

  • TV next to where I'm sitting picked a very imperfect time to fail at life. 
  • My smart phone says Marshall is pitching and the TV across the bar seems to show two out.  Good times.
  • TV has returned to life!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Very uneventful 7th inning, except for four gentlemen in their late 30's swapping the loudest most intense stories like they're trying to one-up each other.


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Abbath's swing is very similar to Goldy's

Beer 5: Union Jack IPA by Firestone Walker

  • I love me some IPAs......
  • Reed in now.  I'm still torn on what to think of him as a closer, but one out makes me feel a bit better.
  • 2 outs...................
  • 3 outs!!! GAME OVER!!!!!

Good times and good fun.  Keep drinking craft beer my fellow fans.

Bells and whistles

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[Click to enlarge, at fangraphs.com]
Paul Goldschmidt: Aaron Hill, +19.4%
Goldschmidtesque: Josh Collmenter, +14.3%
Tim Lincecum: Gerardo Parra, -6.3%

Yes, we did get the popcorn, and it was good. DbacksSkins ended with an even 100 comments, ahead of TolkienBard and JoeCB1991. Also enjoying the Goldtivities were: BulldogsNotZags, Clefo, Diamondhacks, GuruB, Jim McLennan, Makakilo, MrMrrbi, Rockkstarr12, asteroid, blank_38, cheese1213, cole8865, ford.williams.10, hotclaws, onedotfive, preston.salisbury, shoewizard and txzona. Reaching an impressive double-digits in recs was this screenshot by Bulldogs.

It's a 7:10pm first pitch tomorrow night for the second game, with Brandon McCarthy going up against Ryan Vogelsong.

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