A Full Metal Beercap: Dbacks 4 Giants  1

Christian Petersen

This will be the most metal recap EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Record: 32-45. Pace: 67-95. Change on 2013/2010/2004: -9/+2/+5

Welcome, to the most metal recap ever!!!!!!!!!


Nathan Explosion plays to win

Beer 1:  Homebrew (English Style Brown) by Turambar

  • Missed both the first and second innings thanks to my buddy and I speaking of beer back at my place.  Enjoyed my most recent homebrew, which is decent in my opinion, though it didn't score anywhere near where it needed to for a competition I entered it into.  25pts out of 50.......sigh
  • Shockingly we're down despite Timmeh pitching against our own Metal God Goldy.  0-1
  • The box score says Panda got a triple, but that would be physically impossible.  Unless of course he can bend space and time........


Dio is magic though, and would have no problem hitting a triple.

Beer 2:  Pilsner Urquell Czech Pilsner by Plzensky Prazdroj

  • Normally not my beverage of choice but Papago is trying to get another fresh cask of Urquell flown in like they did last year.  Vote for Papago Brewing Company!!!!  http://draftmag.com/pilsner/agegate.php#vote
  • Realized that riding my bike for these recaps, while wise, is much harder to do in this summer heat.
  • Collmenter makes things interesting in the top of the 3rd, but keeps on rocking without any blood given.
  • You may be asking yourself "Turambar, why the metal theme?"  To which I will respond "because I can."
  • Someone really should tell Timmeh that if you can't grow a stache then you really shouldn't try.


Papa Emeritus II does not approve of Timmeh's mustache.

Beer 3:  Arrogant Bastard American Strong Ale by Stone Brewing Co.

  • A beer with an attitude on both the label and in the bottle.  A high gravity American Strong Ale with enough of a hop bite to make you think of an IPA, but enough maltyness to make you think otherwise.
  • Walking Goldy.  Might be the first time Timmeh has make the right choice when Goldy is at bat......
  • but Timmeh's "wisdom" comes back to haunt him as Aaron Hill comes through for us.  1-1
  • Prado, who is still kinda bugging all of us with his play this season, comes through with a double!!!  2-1
  • At 91 pitches Collmenter does appear to be a bit tired, the 1st out comes off a very very very long popup towards the pool.  Makes me a bit nervous.
  • This umpire's strike zone appears to be interesting...but at least helpful that inning. 
  • After the top of the 5th it's still 2-1 Dbacks and I very much doubt Collmenter will pitch in the 6th.
  • Fun fact time.  Jim Carrey, being a big death metal fan, personally requested to have Cannibal Corpse appear in Ace Ventura.


Yup, one of the most brutal death metal bands ever was in a movie many of us saw as a kid.

Beer 4:  Avery IPA by Avery Brewing

  • Yup, I just got to get my IPA fix
  • Owings got greedy on that, way way way way too greedy.  Easy out at home, but........ I guess the new rules just don't apply about the catcher being unable to block the plate before having he ball????
  • Inciarte does score though...which is nice  3-1 Dbacks
  • Perez is in now for the top of the 6th and I am starting to become a fan of this umps strike zone.  3-1 going into the bottom of the 6th.
  • Hmmm.  The TV just informed me that Aaron Hill also loves batting practice again Timmeh.
  • Goldy, once again, loves him some Timmeh pitching.
  • Hill doesn't quite prove the TV right, but he drives in a run.  4-1


Metal album covers are just so .......metal

  • TV next to where I'm sitting picked a very imperfect time to fail at life. 
  • My smart phone says Marshall is pitching and the TV across the bar seems to show two out.  Good times.
  • TV has returned to life!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Very uneventful 7th inning, except for four gentlemen in their late 30's swapping the loudest most intense stories like they're trying to one-up each other.


Abbath's swing is very similar to Goldy's

Beer 5: Union Jack IPA by Firestone Walker

  • I love me some IPAs......
  • Reed in now.  I'm still torn on what to think of him as a closer, but one out makes me feel a bit better.
  • 2 outs...................
  • 3 outs!!! GAME OVER!!!!!

Good times and good fun.  Keep drinking craft beer my fellow fans.

Bells and whistles

[Click to enlarge, at fangraphs.com]
Paul Goldschmidt: Aaron Hill, +19.4%
Goldschmidtesque: Josh Collmenter, +14.3%
Tim Lincecum: Gerardo Parra, -6.3%

Yes, we did get the popcorn, and it was good. DbacksSkins ended with an even 100 comments, ahead of TolkienBard and JoeCB1991. Also enjoying the Goldtivities were: BulldogsNotZags, Clefo, Diamondhacks, GuruB, Jim McLennan, Makakilo, MrMrrbi, Rockkstarr12, asteroid, blank_38, cheese1213, cole8865, ford.williams.10, hotclaws, onedotfive, preston.salisbury, shoewizard and txzona. Reaching an impressive double-digits in recs was this screenshot by Bulldogs.

It's a 7:10pm first pitch tomorrow night for the second game, with Brandon McCarthy going up against Ryan Vogelsong.

Log In Sign Up

Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join AZ Snake Pit

You must be a member of AZ Snake Pit to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at AZ Snake Pit. You should read them.

Join AZ Snake Pit

You must be a member of AZ Snake Pit to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at AZ Snake Pit. You should read them.




Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.