Your Diamondbacks Dream Job

If you could commandeer any job in the Dbax universe, what would it be? I imagine we have one or two wannabe GMs out there....or a hundred and seven. Who wants to run promos, launder Goldy's underwear or be the usher? Well, not the Usher. An usher. You could wear a red polo, see games and ...well...ush!

Here's my top three:

3) Chase Field Tour Guide - the structure itself often goes underappreciated (ie 'airplane hangar'), and I'd like to share my enthusiasm for it. The roof and girder system. Outfield panels. Sightlines and various vantage points along the concourse. Relate facility history and anecdotes, on and off the field.

2) Radio announcer - first, I have the looks for this. Second, my dulcet baritone still makes grown men tingle and schoolgirls weep (or is it the other way around?), despite forfeiting some resonance over the past decade to dwindling testosterone. I like Schulte's voice and overall demeanor (this is another testosterone 'tell'), but honestly think I could animate game action for listeners a little more at times.

1. Owner / Managing Partner - this is mostly priorities and personal vision and hiring the right people to realize that.

-- I'd be more aggressive building the team and less aggressive selling the brand.

-- I'd also try to broadly sell baseball more, the sport itself with its inherent ups and downs, and grant fans more permission to evaluate and build their connection to it - and by extension, to my brand - instead of trying to knock people over the head with what strikes me as a dictated, oversold brand.

-- I'd offer cheaper single game ticket prices, particularly in the upper deck and on weeknights, even if it cost me some direct or shared revenue, because I think it's a sound, long term strategy.

-- Downside: Biggest fears as poobah probably entail safety. Terrorism. A catastrophic accident, like a structural breach or someone falling from the upper deck because the rail's too low. People harmed or killed on my watch. But I'd still welcome a chance to right this profitable battleship.

What's your dream gig?

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