This is as close to a "happy Diamondback" photo as you get in tonight's selection. (Photo by Christian Petersen/Getty Images)
Record: 20-26; Pace: 70-92; Change on 2011: -3
Alright everybody, let's do this. It's the first time the Diamondbacks have faced the Brewers since last October, and we all remember how that turned out. But, c'mon, we're back in our home ballpark, where we won our two games in the NLDS. Plus, we're riding a one-game win streak, and we've got our Opening Day starter, Ian Kennedy, on the mound! Let's go!
... Hey, where'd everybody go? In particular, where did our offense go? Ohhh, right, they all remembered how killer Yovani Gallardo is in his career against the Diamondbacks. So they all decided to go hide in the woods, then, that's it? Huh. Well, somebody better climb over the electric fence and bring them back, because we're going to need them the rest of the weekend.
The two teams traded zeros in the first inning, with both pitchers throwing fewer than 10 pitches apiece. Rickie Weeks took care of that in the 2nd inning, as he knocked a solo home run to the left-center bleachers. Still, Ian Kennedy was looking good, he even had four strikeouts through the first three innings.
Then came the 4th inning. Nyjer Morgan singled to lead off the frame, and advanced to second on Kennedy's fourth balk of the season. That ended up not mattering much though, because he was brought home by a two-run home run by Ryan Braun. Aramis Ramirez singled, and two outs later Travis Ishikawa was hit by a pitch to move Ramirez to second, who scored on a single by Cesar Izturis. Just like that, the Brewers' 1-0 lead was a 4-0 lead.
And that 4-0 Brewers lead was insurmountable, especially with Yovani Gallardo on the mound. Pay no attention to the 4.62 ERA, folks, Gallardo owns the Diamondbacks. In five regular season starts and two 2011 NLDS games, he has a 6-0 record and a 1.23 ERA, and that ERA will surely go down after tonight's matchup. Jason Kubel led off the 2nd inning with a walk, but Chris Young ground into a double play, and Kennedy singled to lead off the 3rd inning but Willie Bloomquist ground into a double play. Finally in the 4th inning, our leadoff runner did score, but that was only because Kubel took matters into his own hands and hit a home run to center as a birthday present to himself.
Ian Kennedy, unfortunately, continued to struggle. He bases were loaded with two outs in the 5th on an error by Bloomquist, but Willie got another chance to end the inning and this time did so successfully. The base runners kept coming in the 6th with a double, a single to left (which didn't score the runner), and a walk. Kennedy was replaced by Brad Ziegler, who got Ryan Braun to harmlessly ground out.
Josh Collmenter came in for the 7th inning and did fine, but had his first problematic outing as a reliever in the 8th inning. Former Diamondback and new waiver-wire-acquisition Brewer Cody Ransom singled to lead it off, and Corey Hart followed shortly thereafter with a two-run home run. Collmenter also gave up a single to Nyjer Morgan, and was then pulled for Bryan Shaw, who got two outs via the strike-em-out, throw-em-out double play. Craig Breslow made a mess of the 9th inning by loading the bases with nobody out, but thankfully allowed only a sacrifice fly to make it 7-1. Still, when you say "Oh good, it's only 7-1," you know it hasn't been a good evening.
Yet hope remains while company is true, and a few of us stuck it out for the sad attempts at comebacks. They were such sad attempts though, I'm not even sure you can call them attempted comebacks. In the 7th, 8th, and 9th innings, the Diamondbacks had two runners reach base; in the 7th and 9th, it was even the first two batters reaching base. In the 7th, Chris Young ground into his second double play of the evening, followed by a Lyle Overbay strikeout. In the 8th inning, after Francisco Rodriguez walked Willie Bloomquist, Ryan Roberts went first-pitch fishing and ground into an inning-ending double play. At least there were no double plays in the 9th inning, where we faced a seriously struggling reliever named Jose Veras - after walking Upton and Kubel, CY struck out looking, Overbay almost got a hit to center but it was caught, and Josh Bell struck out swinging.
30 Going on 31: J Kubel, +19.6%
Not Elektric: I Kennedy, -17.3%
Needs An Alias: C Young, -25.9%
As you can see, our hopes never really got off the ground tonight, which is too bad because the fans were pretty into the game, especially the ones mercilessly booing Braun all night long. The fans around here, meanwhile, were a mix of downtrodden and sardonic, aka the usual. Twenty eight people stopped by, and ish95 led the way. Dc came in second and Rockstarr was third. All present were: Clefo, imstillhungry95, txzona, snakecharmer, Jim McLennan, Rockkstarr12, hotclaws, AzDbackfanInDc, rd33, BattleMoses, Muu, luckycc, Ridster09, CaptainCanuck, Stupendous Man, dbacks79, Bryn21, AZDBACKR, G.O.B., ackbartehtrap, piratedan7, 4 Corners Fan, Marc Fournier, leemellon, rfffr, dbacks25, Wimb, and shoewizard.
Wimb wins Comment of the Day in a landslide victory, and he did so on his first comment in over a week! The lucky chum.
Tomorrow is making-a-case-to-be-the-ace Wade Miley against Zach Greinke. Don't forget to put on your black jerseys! And if you find any Diamondbacks hanging in your closet attached to said jerseys, kindly return them to Chase Field at your earliest convenience.