SnakeBytes, May 9th: Well, that sucked

Yeah, last night it felt like I was playing video-game baseball against SnakePit Jr. On a wonky controller. After breaking both of my thumbs. Oh, and to add insult to injury, Braun's home-run off Boyer was the third-longest in the majors this season, measuring 467 ft, so replacing Mark Reynolds' blast in that spot on the list.

Happy Mother's Day to all mothers. Recaps below, but you might want to skip to after the jump.

Recaps

• [FoxSportsArizona.com] Trading chips available - "They piled on us and embarrassed us. This will test us. They shoved it in our face in our home ball park, kind of the way that our offense likes to do it. You take you beating like a man and show up tomorrow and try to salvage your pride."
• [dbacks.com] Valdez's second start not as good as first - In other news, Basic Instinct 2 "not as good as first"...
• [Yahoo!] Gerut hits for cycle as Brewers rout D'backs 17-3 - "They were just relentless and never gave in, so he couldn’t find ways to end the at-bats in our favor," Diamondbacks manager A.J. Hinch said.
• [AZCentral] Diamondbacks routed by Brewers - Gerut hit for the cycle...but because it came amid a 17-3 Milwaukee Brewers victory, the part-time outfielder barely showed any emotion. "I tried to contain myself because the game was so out of control," Gerut said. "I tried to respect the fact we were up that big."
• [Brew Crew Ball] Brewers 17, Diamondbacks 3 - "If you missed tonight's game, sucks for you, because you missed some Brewers history. The offense was once again in feast or famine mode, this time opting for feast. "

Team News and Notes

• [AZCentral] Diamondbacks seek to rebound - "Getting swept by the Brewers wouldn't define the Diamondbacks' entire season. But another lopsided loss could be catastrophic at the moment, Hinch implied. What Arizona needs is just a sound overall game without some of the silly mistakes. That, and the pitchers definitely have to cut down on the walks."
• [dbacks.com] Abreu swinging hot bat for D-backs - Right up until the first inning last night, anyway... :-(
• [AZCentral] Diamondbacks' bats helping team stay afloat - "As a group, the entire lineup has managed to contribute on a fairly consistent basis without the likes of the injured Miguel Montero and Conor Jackson. And Justin Upton, who got a day off on Friday, hasn't come close to finding his stride, either."
• [dbacks.com] Ryal adapting to pinch-hitting role - "I wouldn't say you are ever comfortable, but you want to be confident," Ryal said. "I think you just want to have confidence that you're going to have a good at-bat and do your job"
• [AJC.com] Ex-Braves excelling for Diamondbacks - "Kelly’s just getting lucky as hell, playing way out of his league," LaRoche joked in a text message. "I haven’t changed a thing. Have some pretty good hitters around me, so they have to throw strikes."
• [South Bend Tribune] Silver Hawks: Owings blast finishes sweep - "[Chase] Anderson pitched a seven-inning complete game shutout as South Bend snuffed the Dragons, 3-0, in the first game Saturday. Owings capped a Silver Hawks' comeback in the nightcap with a walk-off homer in the eighth inning to power South Bend to a doubleheader sweep...in biting 43-degree weather."

Around baseball

• [AP] Nationals swap former Diamondbacks - "The Washington Nationals have called up reliever Doug Slaten from Triple-A Syracuse, adding a second left-hander to their bullpen. To make room for the 30-year-old Slaten, the Nationals designated left-hander Matt Chico for assignment."
• [McCovey Chronicles] Post-game thread: Mets walk off again - "It's not fair, but I'm blaming Bengie Molina for both of these losses. If Molina signed with the Mets, there's no way that Rod Barajas and Henry Blanco are hitting walk-off home runs against the Giants."
• [Gaslamp Ball] Padres defeat Astros, 2-1. Bandwagon holding steady - "I'm being totally honest. This team is talented enough to win this division, but only if every other team continues to work off of last year's playbooks. By the All-Star Break, my biggest fear isn't that Adrian or Heath will be traded. My biggest fear is that the other teams will have us figured out."
• [True Blue LA] Mannywood Again Open For Business - Manny Ramirez returned to the Dodger lineup after missing 14 games with a strained right calf. With him, they scored 6.5 runs/game; without, 3.9. Mind you, last night's 8-0 drubbing won't have helped.
• [MLB.com] MRI confirms Young's shoulder strain - "Padres righty to be re-evaluated in two to three weeks."